Sunday Phunnies

You can say what you want about Florida , but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving north.
These are actual ads seen in ''The Villages'' Florida newspaper.
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FOXY LADY:
Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty,
80's, slim, 5'4' (used to be 5'6'),
Searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion.
Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
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LONG-TERM COMMITMENT:
Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband,
Looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness,
Fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.
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SERENITY NOW:
I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and
Meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together,
Take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.
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WINNING SMILE:
Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flossier
To share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.
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BEATLES OR STONES?
I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on
Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar.
If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen,
let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.
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MEMORIES:
I can usually remember Monday through Thursday.
If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads
Together.
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MINT CONDITION:
Male, 1932 model , high mileage, good condition, some hair,
Many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves.
Isn't in running condition, but walks well.