Sunday Phunnies

State Mottos

Alabama:
Litterasy Ain't Everthing

Alaska:
11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!
Arizona:
But It's a Dry Heat

Arkansas:
We Made Him Governor Because We're Idiots ... What's Your Excuse for Making Him President?

California:
Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda

Colorado:
If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother

Connecticut:
Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedy's Don't Own It Yet

Delaware:
We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water.

Florida:
Ask Us About Our Grandkids

Georgia:
Just as Good as Alabama ... Without Their High IQ

Hawaii:
Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru
(Death To Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)

Idaho:
More Than Just Potatoes ... Well Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good

Illinois:
Please Don't Pronounce the "S"

Indiana:
2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free

Iowa:
We Do Amazing Things With Corn

Kansas:
First Of The Rectangle States

Kentucky:
Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names

Louisiana:
We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign

Maine:
We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster

Maryland:
If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It

Massachusetts:
Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)

Michigan:
First Line Of Defense From The Canadians

Minnesota:
10,000 Lakes And 10,000,000 Mosquitoes

Mississippi:
Yes, We Have Electricity!

Missouri:
Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work

Montana:
And Very Little Else

Nebraska:
Ask About Our State Motto Contest

Nevada:
Prostitutes and Poker!

New Hampshire:
Go Away and Leave Us Alone

New Jersey:
You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here, You ##$%##!!

New Mexico:
Lizards Make Excellent Pets

New York:
You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney

North Carolina:
Tobacco Is A Vegetable

North Dakota:
We Really Are One Of The 50 States!

Ohio:
At Least We're Not Michigan

Oklahoma:
Like The Play, Only No Singing

Oregon:
Spotted Owl ... It's What's For Dinner

Pennsylvania:
Cook With Coal

Rhode Island:
We're Not REALLY An Island

South Carolina:
Remember The Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender

South Dakota:
Closer Than North Dakota

Tennessee:
The Educashun State

Texas:
Si, Hablo Ingles
(Yes, I Speak English)

Utah:
Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus

Vermont:
Yep

Virginia:
Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?

Washington:
Help! We're Overrun By Computer Nerds And Grunge-Slackers!

Washington, D.C.:
Wanna Be Mayor?

West Virginia:
One Big Happy Family ... Just Ask Uncle Daddy!

Wisconsin:
Come Cut The Cheese

Wyoming:
Where Men Are Men ... And Sheep Are Afraid

Bowling Alley: Please be quiet. We need to hear a pin drop.
Cafeteria: Shoes are required to eat in the cafeteria. Socks can eat any place they want.
Music Library: Bach in a minuet.
Funeral Home: Drive carefully, we'll wait.